Waffles

It’s been an interesting week or so. I’ll admit that one day I said to myself this is too much I need to just wait or maybe stop. I’m not sure what brought it on other than going to soccer and watching a mom chase after a toddler the entire time we were there. I remember how exhausting that was. But I also had a newborn and a toddler. That was crazy time for me. So hard. I’d like to think if I progress this and all works out maybe this one would be the ‘laidback, sleeps through whole night at 6 weeks old, no colic, happiest baby on the block baby. Hah.
I think after feeling so sure it’s been tough to sort through the times when I’m thinking what the heck. The thing I keep coming back to is I feel like if I don’t try I will wonder about what ‘might’ve been’ the rest of my life and I just don’t want that.
So....I’m pushing forward. I’ve taken many nightly lupron shots now and other than hoping to not forget and them stinging a bit, they’ve been no problem. Yesterday I had my baseline ultrasound and she said everything looks really good. I also had lab work with measuring my E2 and progesterone, which measured a bit high, so they want me to just continue Lupron until the number drops much less than 100. I looked at the test result and mine was high 90’s. They also did a few cultures to make sure  I don’t have any active infections. I’m actually already taking an antibiotic because Friday I was able to talk to the DR and tell him how not well I’d been feeling since the hscope. Just achy, mild feverish, generally feeling unwell. He wasn’t sure but if something going on in uterus or Uti he wanted to treat.
Today I’m feeling okay, I’d say. Busy weekend as old nanny was in town.
Something kind of odd is that when I had the baseline appointment I kind of wanted to do it just by myself. Not sure why, like for some reason I wanted no distractions, just me. It’s odd because I was just saying a bit ago that it felt lonely going to the hscope by myself.
Maybe it’s the hormones talking and I just don’t know what I want!

Another crazy last week is that I interviewed for a job outside my company. It all happened fast as I had talked to the recruiter the week before and initially said no because the job is 40+miles from my house. But thought twice over the weekend about not even trying to see what I thought so reached back out to recruiter on Tuesday and he asked if I could interview Thursday, so I did.
I was pretty underwhelmed with them as they are really far behind what I  would consider modern Human Resources. I’d actually still be open if I thought the leader was looking to change or transform the function. But, ummm, no. Planning to retire in a few years.
I was intially going to send a note saying thanks but no thanks, then reconsidered that and decided just to stay quiet and see what they have to say.
I’m glad I went at the very least because when I put on my suit jacket, fixed my hair, and actually put on some makeup I felt really good about myself. Also just practicing interviewing is always helpful. It got me thinking about focusing on my career for a bit longer, which I think is positive as well.
Will see....