T minus Days

It’s getting closer and closer. The transfer is scheduled next week! I had my monitoring appointment on Friday and it went really well. My uterus looked good, no fluid/cysts, etc and my lining still at 13mm. Dr said that if there were going to be issues that would come up to make us push out the date they typically show up in this last appointment. Since it was good, we will do one more monitoring appointment the day before transfer.
My medication is about to change tomorrow. I stop the dexameth.asone and patches, but add in the lovely progesterone in oil shots and doxy.cycline. I also have to add an extra estr.ace at night. For some reason they gave specific instruction to do the prog at 10:00am everyday so I’ll do my best to stick to that. I just pulled out those needles and they sure are long.
I’m ready to let the dex go because I think it has increased my appetite over last week by a lot. Of course it could also be due to stress, in either case it’s noticeable. Lots of carbs.
I was able to follow up with GI PA and thankfully nothing crazy showed up. She said the scan would have showed a clot issue. They had another test I could do if pain continued but I have to say over the last 2-3 dats it has gotten better. I am really thinking it was all kicked off by the medicine and its side effects. It just seems strange that the dr didn’t think they were related. Not sure but I’m overly cautious with anything out of the norm and was perfectly fine checking things out...so glad I did.

I ended up calling my sister last week and telling her I need her to come. She said she would do it if I needed her and didn’t really push back at all. I did tell her that I needed her to come with positive energy only and could she do that?? She said yes, so I can only hope she sticks to her word. I’m also hopeful that physically she can manage because she can’t just go nap for 3 hours if she has a headache. The good news is that the kids are really getting to be self-sufficient, know what needs to get done, and really just need supervised outside, etc. I’d like her to be responsible for meals but will see. I clarified with the Dr that while it is not strict bedrest (except maybe day of) they do want you to have limited moving around for about 3 days.
I just had a thought about when I had the fresh transfer that resulted in my daughter. She had come down right after and was supposed to ‘take care’ of me. And well, that wasn’t fun. I remember asking her to get me a few things and she snapped ‘no’ just sighed a lot. Pretty unhelpful and not supportive. This is the hard part about sisters and my relationship with her. It’s been so up down and sideways over the years I just won’t know until it happens.
I was discouraged recently because when I was trying to get ahold of her to get this coordinated I was just feeling a lot of stress. I called her multiple times and texted and she would not call back. It just made me feel like once again, here we go. When I actually need her she falls apart. Consistently. I actually researched online sisters not being there for you and what to do. I talked to a good friend of mine and she brought me back down and said I need to limit my expectations of her. She just hasn’t been able to provide the emotional support that I need. Incapable? Doesn’t know how? Not sure. But, that’s why it remains complicated for me because I still hope it will change.
I did at least tell her that her not responding made me feel like she wasn’t there for me and she just said she would try. I don’t know.....more than I can process through right now.
I just need her to come, physically take care of the kids, and be positive. If it starts to go south I’ll need to tell her she has to go to a hotel or home early. For real.

My focus is to stay positive (which I am) and just focus on what I can do to prepare. Interestingly I have not wanted to research anything about embryo quality, fet processes, etc. I just don’t want to fill my brain with things that won’t be helpful. So I’ve decided it’s best not to read about any of it. I started to look a few times and it just spiked up my anxiety so nope done. A bit of a departure from what I would normally do but I think it’s just my way to do self-care.

Something else kind of exciting is that my coworker told me she’s wondering if she’s pregnant. She is married, has a 2 year old, just turned 40. She talked about having a miscarriage last January and they’ve been trying again for about 6 months. I’ve never been pregnant at the same time as anyone else who I would really ‘talk’ to so I’m going to cross fingers for both of us.