So the key word is ‘try’ and I’m not doing a very good job. Frankly, I’m fed up with my sister. I have been calling her for 3 days now and I've left multiple voicemails and texts saying call me. When I tried today the phone just goes straight to voicemail now. I've called multiple times today too and all to voicemail. What. The. F.
I’m beyond mad for several reasons but the biggest is—-it can’t be about her right now! I’m very stressed this week not to mention the crap ton of hormones I’m pumping into myself. Not having her reach back out is raising my stress level substantially. Is something wrong? Is she feeling sick? Migraines? Unless something major is going on there is not a good enough excuse she can come up with not to text me back which takes a few seconds. This has long been a pattern of behavior with her but I just didn’t need it to rear it’s head now of all times.
There is a piece of me that is a bit worried so I did reach out to the one friend she has via text to ask if she has heard from her and she said no. She said she texted my sister earlier this week to see if she wanted to have lunch and she hasn't heard back. I told her I haven't heard from her for days again (Ive had to reach out to this friend before) and I told her that if I don't hear from her by tomorrow, she will need to go find her. She agreed and said she'd help however she could.
Sunflower, thanks for your comment on my last post. Sister relationships can be beyond sometimes.
So, I feel like I’m scrambling to try and get physical help. I have no idea where she is or what she’s planning on doing so I need a backup plan. Old nanny has her daughter's prom. I know she wants to come but I told her I don't want her to. I will not be the person that takes someone’s mother away for such a special event. I called my other friend in the same city old nanny is as we’ve recently reconnected and it’s kind of short notice for her. She works and is divorced with two teenagers. It’s more the work thing. I did ask her if she could come thurs-sun and she said she’s got several appts on Thursday and she said it wouldn’t work. Then, I asked what about Friday to sun and she said probably not.I think it’s just too much for her. I understand but am disappointed.
My last call was to my old grad school friend that I’ve stayed in touch with all these years. She ironically lives in same city as old nanny. We’ve got a pretty good friendship. The thing is, she just started a new job and they’ve got one of her first company events on Saturday that she really should be at. She told me of course if I couldn’t line anything else up she would see what she could do.
I didn’t want to ask our current nanny because I just didn’t want her knowing about this. I did break down today and asked if she works her other job on Friday which of course she does and she’s got appointments on Saturday.
I feel disappointed, frazzled, pissed off, and anxious. Just the feelings I should have before a transfer, right? So, I've been feeding my emotions again and have had Mexican several days in a row now, today included. I'm on the M&M diet. Mcd and Mexican--and diet coke. It isn't solving the issue, caffeine isn't the best for me, however it is how I'm managing right now. Working through changing this behavior is for another day. In addition to all this, big change coming on the work front. I'm not focusing on that at the very moment and I'll write more about that soon.
Lots on my plate right now. In addition to all that, the contractor is making a push to get as much done this week at construction house i.e. lighting installed (the guy doing it was from the beginning and we've both had to chase him to show up. It takes a lot of time to coordinate and then re-coordinate when they are no shows....it's getting so old), some appliances delivered (which I've had to coordinate), getting the beam color right, staining the floor, adding shutters, installing plumbing fixtures, etc.. There's a lot to do. The one thing the designer hasn't done well with is the front door. He wanted to order it, but they said 3 weeks and he thought he could get it faster. Well....2 weeks later we still don't have an order in anywhere else and if he would have just done it, we'd be close to having it by now. Also trying to sort out back door--I've been chasing the company for a month to get us a new backdoor that they delivered wrong (been working with the sales guy who could care less about getting it right). Just got a call this am that supposedly they will deliver this Friday. We need a countertop for the master bath still, some of the kitchen hardware still hasn't arrived and a broken fixture is still enroute at lightning company.....it's a lot of little things, but it's a lot when you add it up. I will be SO relieved when I get this house to a place where I can list it for rent. Then, the market will dictate whether I rent it, or if I end up selling. Again, what a beast of a project.
All I can think to do is just breathe and focus.....try to stay as calm as I can and get a new plan in place if I don't hear from my sister in the next 24 hours. I'm fighting the urge to shout, curse, and just be downright super angry....clearly that won't be helpful right now. My instinct is to just cancel with my sister and get another plan in place because I will be so frustrated with how things have gone, and I really don't want that energy around me. Will just see what I can come up with.
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