I'm a little irritated right now. I stayed home from work because not feeling well. Last few days I have felt this overwhelming fatigue....like I could sit in a chair all day, stare at something, and it would be fine. It has taken a lot of effort to just 'get goin'. I feel like I don't have energy for anything. Not sure where this is coming from.....if maybe I am fighting something, or if it is just recovery from the extremely stressful trip back to midwest?
Anyway, last night I decided I would stay home today and spend to the day in bed to see if that would help.
And I have.
However, that is not why I am irritated. Here's the issue....remember the nanny problem w/ warming bottles in the micro even after we discussed? I think she still uses the microwave to warm the bottles. I walked out of my room just now into the kitchen and the digits on the micro were flashing...that means it was recently used. And guess what? She was feeding the baby. I looked to see if she had anything next to her....she did have a cup, but not sure if it was warm or not.
Given how the confrontation went last time, I'd prefer not to address directly.....so what I did say when she spoke to me was, "So the warming the bottles in the microwave is going well?"....she said yes.
My options are to 1) make an issue out of it or 2) let it go. Is this a big enough deal to where I draw the line so firm that if she does it, I will fire her? There are so many other positives about her and this seems to be the only sticking point we have.
I don't know if I'm willing to let her go just yet and start this process all over again.....that stresses me out more than to just let it go.....
Any advice from others?
I'd make an issue out of it, not because it in and of itself is potentially that dangerous, but it means a) the nanny doesn't listen to direction or b) blatantly disregards your wishes, both of which are disturbing when you think it could apply to something a lot more urgent and safety-related. It's all in how you say it. I would just really emphasize how important it is to you to have the bottles warmed manually. If all else fails, hide the microwave! That's what I'd do, in my passive-aggressive way.
ReplyDeleteThere's a lot I did wrong in my early days with my nanny. The biggest was not being firm about things I really wanted.
ReplyDeleteThinking of the things I wish I had done, and how I wish I had done them, here's my advice (after 17 months with the same nanny). Sit down with her - tell her how much you love the care that she gives your girl. That it helps so much to know that someone who nurtures her is with her every day - that when you leave your daughter with her, it's a huge act of trust, that she is taking care of your heart, every day. And then tell her that there's one nagging thing that keeps bothering you. That you asked her not to microwave the bottles -because it denatures milk proteins and can cause hot spots that might burn her - and yet it appears that she keeps doing it. The nanny might not think it's a big deal, but it's a big deal to you, the mother and her boss. You've asked her not to do it, and yet she continues. Which is not only upsetting by itself, but also makes you worried that in the future if you ask her to do something else she thinks is silly, she won't do that either. It's going to be hard for you to fully trust her if she doesn't do this, and that if she continues to microwave the bottles, that loss of trust may cost her her job.
You have to do it. I wish I had, and it's much harder when the little things go on to become really big things.