Another school year finished. End of 2nd grade for my son and end of 5th grade for my girl-her last day of elementary has come to a close. The kids got out of school May 25th, with that week being full of end of year parties and the graduation ceremony for my 5th grader soon to be middle schooler--I'm still shuddering. I just am.
The graduation ceremony was actually really well done. It was in the cafeteria/stage with some nice lighting and decoration which said Class of 2030. That is the year my girl will graduate high school. O.M.G. Not even going there. I sat amongst the crowd and when the program began they started playing Pomp and Circumstance and tears just welled up. I wasn't prepared for that--I didn't realize it would be like a 'real' graduation, I didn't even have tissues. We are in a fairly large school (to me) so there are about 5-6 5th grade classes. The principal gave a speech which a lot of it really resonated with me--she said don't focus on who thinks they are popular, who hit the game winning shot...focus on being kind to people. I like that a lot as being kind was a top 'rule' in our house. She also said kids need to put their phones down and talk to each other--Communicate with speaking....can't agree more. My kids don't have phones and I'll keep it that way as long as humanly possible.
I think through her speech I gained a little more respect for her as a principal. We haven't always seen eye to eye, but what I got from it is that she really does care and she really has a lot of passion for her school. She may be a bit rough around the edges i.e. she told the parents what to do afterwards and then said if they lose their kid it's not her problem (joking, but not really). And the emotion I saw from the teachers as each lead 5th grade teacher gave a speech about their unique class....it was surprising how many of them cried talking about their students. Most of them saying, " I wasn't going to get emotional"....they really really do care. My girl's teacher, this was her first year teaching. I think her tears were because she made it through the year! She said how welcomed and supported she felt. That is nice to hear.
I think this is also the connection I've been missing with this school. This is the first event I've been to in the cafeteria other than the 5th grade sock hop this year (that I can think of). Not because I haven't shown up, they just haven't had them. I know Covid really messed things up with the school year, then protocols afterwards...we missed out on some of this. But, also the school doesn't do a lot of the things we used to do growing up like having a Christmas program, all the parents come, etc.. They have individual class parties which I've gone to as many as the kids would allow me to, but it's different when it's a whole united group all together. I liked it a lot.
I've already talked to the assistant principal and principal about next year and what can we do better to support my son i.e. challenging. This is something that has been an issue since kinder and I'm just not sure the school is able to flex for kids who need more challenge. They've said a few times they can't teach the next grade up, that's fine....but find ways to keep them engaged and learning just like the other students. They only have the GT class once a week, but the rest of the time it's the regular classroom. If I had my way I would let them do GT for part of the day every day. It's just not set up like that in our school district. And for my son, school has just not been stellar--Kinder was Covid and 1st and 2nd grade have not been the best for many reasons--crappy teachers and kids . He really needs a year of good--Good teacher. Good class. Good learning. I also 'asked' (more demanded in a nice way) that he does not have this little girl Bailee in his class next year. Oh this child. She's been in my son's class since Kinder he says and she is to put it nicely a nuisance to him and the class. She's constantly bothering him, wanting to be by him, saying inappropriate things like telling kids in the class about 10 ways to die. What second grader does this? It's clear that she's got some issues and for that I feel sad. However, I feel more for my child's sanity he needs to not be around her anymore.
Now that school is out, we've transitioned to both kids home fulltime and we are trying to figure it all out. I have some camps set up and realized that I needed a few more because the kids just cant' stay home all day with nothing to do. Thankfully right when school got out our neighbors were going on a trip to New Zealand for a few weeks and said we can use their pool. We've used it pretty much every day since school let out. Next week we didn't have anything so I decided to put both of them in 1/2 day basketball camp. They need to stay active, they need some time apart. Both are still kinda getting over sicknesses--my girl did end up having strep and my son is still recovering from virus/congestion. I hope with the break in going to a petri dish every day they will recover and we can just have a break from sickness.
My sister just came for a visit over Memorial Day which was nice....it was really surprising that she fell in love with our dog Hazel. She's never had a dog of her own, only cats. She had her on her lap a lot of the time, took her out, walked her, etc.. and it was so helpful. I feel like if I had another adult around to help with her, it wouldn't be as hard as it's been. I have to admit, I haven't liked it much at all. In fact, it's really affected my mental health. I kind of had an anxiety attack a few weeks ago which I've never had in my life, but didn't realize that's what was happening over those several days. I was feeling the most miserable I felt in my life. I was so irritable, so unhappy, so mad at the world. Which I'm sad to say spilled into how I was parenting. It has just been building since we got the dog. If anyone has ever had a puppy, perhaps you can relate to the constant need to watch them, walk them, feed them....I really think it's harder than a baby because they are a newborn who is mobile, no diapers, has to get taken outside, bites, and doesn't listen. They call it the puppy blues, and perhaps that's all it is. Everything I read says it gets better....but it's enough for me to rethink whether having this dog is right for me and for our family. I've been torn up about it for the last 2 months. I feel like I've been a worse parent and my stress is affecting my daughter's stress level. If it were up to me, I'd totally forgo having an animal at all. But, now that she's here it's a bit harder decision to make. The kids have of course become attached to her, but still aren't too keen on the taking care of her part. My girl has definitely tried to do more and of course Im appreciative.....but it just feels like having another living thing that I'm ultimately responsible for to take care of has tipped me over the edge--broken my peace, upset our rhythm. I do have a friend that is interested in taking her.....and I've tested it with the kids i.e. how would you feel if Hazel lived with our friend. We could visit her, etc.. and of course the answer I get is NO, we love her...etc etc etc. But ultimately if I am not as happy, that's a big price to pay to keep her. I'm very torn. Lots of tears on this one.
Sunflower, thank you for your comments on last post. It's nice to know the yes/no's and other kid stuff is not unique to my kids! Also appreciate the support on the weight loss. I've continued to work on it and am now down -9 lbs. I think over time I'll average 1 lb a week, which is very healthy to lose. Ideally it would be 2 lbs, but if it continues to stay or go down, that's the goal.
Next up is just transitioning into summer--taking the break from school, going on a trip to the midwest over the 4th to see my sister. The kids have been begging to fly back there so I decided it would be a good use of our miles and nice to get out of the southern heat. It's going to be exciting because we are going to visit my 4th grade teacher's farm again. I've stayed in touch w/ her over the years and she was a good friend of my mom's too (she's 89 today!) and she still lives on her farm. We will go out there and have a campfire and also collect fireflies...the kids have never done that so can't wait. Then the multitude of camps with vacation bible school, a few basketball camps, GT camp, my son has speech camp. June looks good and full, July is a bit less full....then mid August back to school.
Here's to Summer 2023!!
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