G'night. Love you. See you in the morning.

Over the years our bed time routine has changed....for some reason we get hooked on something and it sticks. What we are doing now is, usually I am laying on the couch, they are each in their rooms reading...then I'll say "Lights oooout"....then each one takes a turn saying "G'night. Love you. See you in the morning". My response is then to say the same words back to each of them but change up the order. So I'll respond with "Love you, See you in the morning, G'night". Why I started doing it I don't know, but I asked them, Hey, did you notice I change the wording around each time? They both said no. Lol

I haven't talked about the remodel lately. It started June 6 with demo.  Well, it's still pretty much at demo stage and we still have no kitchen.  I was so positive and eager when the fireplace came down...maybe in the wow, look how different it is. Now, 4 months later....I'm sick of the dust, dirt, and washing dishes by hand.  I started my cleaning service back up--i thought for some reason during a remodel they shouldn't come. Uh...that's the opposite of what we need.

I love U.....written in dust.

In summary it has gone super downhill. Serious mistakes were made--as an example, when they were cutting out concrete to make room for the gas line and hvac move, they hit one of the post-tension cables in the foundation with the jackhammer. Think about a rubberband stretched...what happens when you cut the middle of it? Yes, serious safety issue.  That combined with being dismissed when I brought up issues...they tried to say everything was fine, maybe the cable looked odd when it was first built, etc.. knowing I was right about the lack of quality of work and oversight. I had to go around them to get my own cable specialist. Gut intuition is a real thing....on part of it they said yes, we taped up a certain area of the cable, then concrete was poured over so noone could know for sure. In my gut I just knew they didn't do it. Can't tell you why, but I just knew it. The contractor said 100% it was done, let's move on. I didn't let it go.....per the instruction of the cable expert, we ended up digging back up the concrete and sure enough, No they had not done it. Ultimately it was determined yes, it was cut, it was compromised, it needed repair.  They did end up paying for the repair (around $1500) and by then, it was over for me. I had to just fire them.  It's a bit tricky because the contractor owner is a good friend of my designer, but he understood and supported my decision.

So.....

That has lead to me finding new subcontractors myself to help get the job done. The old contractor at least put the beam in (correctly) so we could take down the fireplace and that was the most important part. That sub who did that work was excellent. But now it's a matter of piecing it back together with the flooring, cabinetry, drywall texture (another thing that wasn't done right, which I had paid them for, asked for money to get someone else to fix, but ultimately agreed to their request to let them at least try to fix--which their sub can't get the texture right--and here I sit.)

It's been very stressful and it seems never-ending. There's been something to do to keep things moving almost every day, having people in/out your house.....so the other day I just took a break. No body here, no calls made, no emails, nothing. I needed to just take a real break. And now I'm back at it.

I think we were at the top of the hill, ended up at the bottom, and now slowly climbing back up.

Here's what it looks like right now. Just took this picture. What a mess.

Something else that's been happening simultaneously is that my kids are having big kid firsts. For example, my girl has been "dating" the neighbor Teddy for awhile now. What that means, I still don't know, but now have a better idea. I have seen them holding hands, etc. and have told them about what's acceptable, my expectations, sitting next to each other, etc......so much to my surprise--it was maybe right before school started--and Teddy was over one evening. I had gone in the "kitchen" and was behind the plastic sheet. Teddy had to head out so as he made his way to the front door he walked over to my girl and gave her a kiss--on the lips!! I shouted out loud---HEEEEY! and they both jumped 2 ft in the air, went OH CRAP! We didn't know you were in there!! Teddy quickly ran out and I simply said--No smooching. I wasn't mad, etc. just surprised. Come to find out later on my son snitched and said that he had seen them do that before. What?! So, I've put the kabosh on that, but I can only see with my eyes so much. I'm hoping they don't continue that, but who knows when I'm not around? My girl is 13 and Teddy is 14. I don't think it's appropriate at this age, so I'm hoping she respects that.  We'll see. I make it a point every time Teddy is around now I say 'No smooching'....and I get the sighs and the eye rolls, and the 'we know'.....time will tell.

In addition, right after school started my son came home from school one day looking very serious. He said mom, I have something to show you. Not exactly sure what was going on, he goes to his backpack and pulls out a note......From a girl.  The yellow note 8/23/25 has a picture of a chili pepper on it and says: 

"I like U. Or as people would call it having a crush! heart emoji. From: Camillle.

I asked him how he felt and I was so surprised he wanted to have a conversation about it! He is so much more verbal than my girl....he likes to talk things out. This was our first "big kid" conversation about girls, other than me asking him here or there if there's someone he likes, does anyone like him, etc..other than Caroline who is this little girl who has had a crush on him since pre-k 4. He just asked what he should do about it? So I simply asked him do you like her? Short answer--No. But what I really thought was so special was he said he didn't want to hurt her feelings, so how should he handle it?  My advice was telling him a girl's perspective i.e. don't just ignore her. She will just wonder if you read it, what you thought, etc..and said maybe just tell her thanks for the note. We went back and forth about what he might say, how to say it, etc.. and all was good. I'm not sure exactly what happened at the school the next day but 5 days later he brings home another note from a friend of Camille's. 

It says:

"Camille is making me write this but she wanted to know I (if) you like her?" 

As far as I know, the situation has died down....he hasn't mentioned anything since. I did ask him when I went to school lunch for his birthday which one she was, and he pointed her out. I know girls typically progress in this area faster than boys....honestly my son doesn't care about girls right now. He cares about playing with his buddies, playing soccer....and being active. I'm totally ok with it. I was just so surprised, happy, and maybe even touched that he wanted to share this with me and get advice.  He really is my mini-me. I also tend to talk out situations/feelings. I hope this continues.

The good news is, the further we get from the baby/toddler stage the more I am able to accept they are growing into not just little kids, but big kids. With big kids things.  All that advice through the years is so true...the days are long, but the years are short. It's way harder physically when they are young and harder mentally when they are older. I guess the cliche's exist for a reason. They are true!