The kids went back to school today after the long holiday week off.....and overall it was...nice. We didn't go anywhere and the only thing I had to do was buy brussels sprouts....I literally just learned something--my entire life I thought is was brussel sprouts with no S on the end, but the red line kept coming up saying it was spelled wrong. I looked it up and sure enough there is an S on the end of it--brusselS sprouts. Who knew?
So, I knew I didn't want to fly anywhere and just wasn't sure what we were going to do. Around Monday last week our neighbor mentioned their extended family (5 of them) were coming to visit and we were more than welcome to join them for Thanksgiving dinner on Thursday. Secretly I had been hoping we were going to be invited because I was wanting a bigger get together than our immediate family, but didn't want to cook or travel. We've done a lot of different things to celebrate this holiday--gone to our extended family in Wisconsin, gone to New Orleans to visit friends, stayed at home and made a full spread, stayed at home and did a staycation night at a hotel....and that's also what we decided on this year. We decided to do the hotel on Wednesday to Thursday, then we'd meet up with our neighbors on Thursday afternoon.
We tried a new hotel this year which took a lot of convincing w/ the kids. They are set on the E hotel, since we've gone to both of the close ones over the years. However, I was not thrilled w/ their pool situation (not heated and not super clean) so I decided we should go to a homewood suites. I used to stay at them all of the time when I traveled to Colorado for work and I just loved the 2 room suites, the full size kitchen, having dishes, etc.. They are usually pretty nice. AND, it did not disappoint. The biggest hit was their gym. My son has been asking and asking to be able to do a treadmill, etc. It was fully equipped with cardio and weights so we spent 3 separate trips to it enjoying the new experience--well, me supervising and coaching them. They also had a put put green which we did a few times as well. And finally swimming in the morning on the next day. What was great is that we got to do the activities all by ourselves with noone else around. The hotel was full as was seen at the social Wednesday evening (best chocolate cake ever I let the kids have 2 pieces!), and at the breakfast the following morning. But, it didn't feel like it at all. I think the only bummer was I gave the kids the king bed and I slept on the pull out...kinda not the best sleeping arrangement, but I tried to get some rest, and woke up awfully stiff. Both kids enjoyed it and said YAY to coming back again sometime.
After we left the hotel we had to stop at the grocery store on Thanksgiving day to pick up the brusselS sprouts, cinnamon sticks (per request from neighbor), and ingredients to make corn casserole (my contribution). I didn't realize just how many people are last minute shoppers like us to where it was unbelievable crowded from parking lot to store to checkout. Couldn't wait to get outta there.
The holiday itself was nice--we went to neighbors around 3pm with warm corn casserole just baked. This is a good example of a time when I'm actually glad my kids are older. The guests had 3 kids ages 5, 3, and 1. You have to actively supervise, chase, cut up food, etc. which I gladly watched the mom do (ok I did go after the baby a few times as she climbed the stairs)...but I remember those days and it always seemed stressful to me trying to wrangle the kiddos all by myself. I remember feeling quite anxious, especially at someone else's house worried what they were getting into...sweating a lot. This year I got to kick back, watch everyone else run around, and enjoy myself while my kids played quite well with the neighbor kids and checked in with me every now and then to give me hugs and kisses. I didn't move from that spot only to get more food for 4 hours. Of course I did ask if I could help in the kitchen, etc. but when they said no, I gladly walked back out. Our other older neighbor couple came as well (well I kinda organized that one) because the woman told me she was so sad because all of her kids weren't coming this year as they always do. I said she should come with us to the other neighbor but she didn't want to invite herself. So, I texted them and asked them to invite her....it worked out really well. I sat next to them for most of the time and all the adults just gabbed, answered questions from some card game....and just enjoyed the food.
On top of that, I actually put up my outside christmas decorations before even December 1st! I haven't put the bushes lights on in many years, but I guess I had a bit more energy to just go for it. My girl also got all the holiday inside decorations out and I let her go to town. She loves decorating...well, just that part. She doesn't like the cleaning and preparing to decorate part. Our tree is up with just lights for now...our regular lights of 8 years finally gave out so had to buy new, and of course I'm particular about how bright they are ( I like the very dim), I had to buy a few sets to get the right ones.
Of course nothing is without a few bumps...last weekend the kids were starting to really go downhill in behavior...lots of bickering, arguing with me, etc and I kinda had to set 'em straight. It was getting to the point where no matter what I asked them, there was a murmured comment or outright backtalk about why they shouldn't have to do XYZ. It wasn't pretty as I got upset Sunday night and as were were driving into town on Monday morning for an appointment, I told them we were having a family meeting in the car. Before we left I asked them to think about how things were going and be prepared to share their thoughts and feelings. I started off by saying I was disappointed in their behavior, I thought they were acting disrespectful, gave them examples, etc. Then I had both of them take a turn to express how they were feeling. Then, I asked them to think about what they needed from the other people and each got a turn to say, Mom, I need you to X, Brother, I need you to X.....then finally, we wrapped it up with what each person was going to work on. I was SO SO proud of that meeting because it was one of the first times my girl really openly shared her thoughts and feelings, and verbalized them without significant prompting, and my boy was able to share a few things with his sister that she likely didn't realize i.e. that she shuts him down a lot when he tries to speak. She shushes him a lot...when she's feeling irritable unfortunately he is her target and she lashes at him...but to be fair, he silently provokes her with just getting in her space and refusing to move when asked, as an example. I think the re-set discussion went well because we all felt a bit lighter and things shifted after that. Thankfully....which made for a nicer rest of the week.
I'm working on a shift in medication which started Nov 11 and hasn't been the easiest. I haven't changed medication in 8 years. I am ramping up the new one while going down on the old one. The earlier part of the week when it was time to stop the old one--for about 3 days I started getting quite dizzy, lots of vertigo, etc. and it was progressively getting worse. The on call Dr. said he wanted to go even slower w/ the tapering down. Once we added it back in I felt much better. It wasn't lost on me that the days I was struggling a bit and irritable were also the days the kids were the same way. It's going to take some time to see how this new medication is working better, the same, worse, etc.. I will say that in some ways it seems somewhat better in that I feel a bit lighter? The overwhelming feeling of heaviness that made it hard to just do stuff seems lighter?....but time will tell. I think the best thing to come out of the expensive personal training sessions (which I do not plan to renew, don't see high enough value and the owner was very pushy about it) was that I realized that if I was working out, eating better, drinking less caffeine and Still not feeling much better, something else was going on. The process of elimination made me realize that maybe it was time to try a new medication. I might not have done it otherwise. And for that, the training was worth it. Like I said, will see how it goes.
With kids back to school today our schedule starts back up....my girl was successful in getting the Prop Leader role this time for the musical they will be doing instead of a play. She started her first rehearsal tonight with more Wednesday and Saturday. Tomorrow my son starts basketball practice twice a week, once Tuesday once Friday, games pick up in January on Saturdays. I know December will fly by so I should at least wish you all:
Happy Holidays!
PS Sunflower thank you for taking the time to respond to my last post on families. It really is helpful to hear how other families discuss amongst themselves and what terminology is used.
No comments:
Post a Comment