Apparently people here think they are invincible, didn’t need to wear masks, and socially distance. Apparently cramming into a bar was more important.
I’m honestly feeling mad. Mad that a lot of people don’t seem to give two craps about other people. Wearing a mask is not about you. A girl on the news said it best that following the rules is not political it’s about humanity.
I’m thinking I’m in a similar spot as others in that I’m fatigued. Is this ever going to end?? When can I go to the store and not worry I’m going to catch something that could make me die? How many bottles of sanitizer will I use? How many more times do I need to say ‘No’ to my kids and have them answer for me ‘It’s because of the virus’.?
I was starting to do more and more back in public and feeling less anxious about it. The more I did the better I felt about being back ‘out’. For example, I debated a bit about swimming classes. The school we went to last summer was offering one on one lessons for group rate in month of June. At first I ignored the email, but as time went on I thought more/did research. The instructors wore shields, they checked temps, sanitized chairs after each class, etc. SO....we did it. They’ve had class Monday and Wednesday and it’s been really good. The kids have really liked seeing other people again and getting to do something other than ride bikes and just look at parks they couldn’t play in. My son has even learned to do some strokes and last year he was just learning how to float. He’s come a long way.
We also started going to our 2 neighborhood pools once they opened. When it’s 100degrees there just isn’t much else to do. You have to stay socially distanced in the pool— which for me is easy but my extremely extroverted daughter just can’t help herself trying to play with someone other than her brother. I don’t blame her, really. She has likely felt stifled at home.
Side note, but a good one, is that we have again gotten some improvement with moods/behavior and I can’t be more grateful.
I can only hope it helps stop the rate of infection.
The governor did say that schools will be returning to in person instruction in the fall however, given where we are now, I suspect they could roll that back too. Please no.
Overall we are hanging in there like everyone else. However, I took a look back at my goals I set up and I’m not doing so well. Not well at all.
1. No caffeine: fell off wagon. Every time we or I eat out I get a fountain Diet Coke. And I will say it’s so delicious, I love it and there’s a reason it’s addictive for me. I get a ‘good feel’ when I think about it for lunch and I get a ‘downer feel’ when Im not going to have for lunch. Ugh. I looked back and can’t believe I quit for two whole weeks. I had been working on trying to find a substitute like the caffeine free but it just isn’t that good. My therapist told me something that was a light bulb—there probably isn’t anything that will substitute. She’s probably right. But, I just don’t want to give it up right now.
2. Limiting eating out: fell off wagon. Took kids 3 x this week and we actually went in the restaurant (clearly stopping that ASAP). This one is just me being lazy and using it as a coping method.
3. Better sleep hygiene: fell off wagon. I read that one book ( actually liked it) but when my girl struggles to fall asleep sometimes until 11, I still want my ME time. That and because of the caffeine I’m simply not tired.
So, this is actually good reflecting space. I didn’t realize until now I’m just way off track. Crazy off track. Honestly I keep telling myself just hang in until August when kids go to school...THEN I can really focus. Then I ask myself why not now? And then I tell myself I’m not sure I have it in me right now, that’s why. I’ve told myself that these are hard times. Maybe all that is excuse. Well, it kind of is, but at this moment I’m ok w it.
My mental conversation at its finest.
On some happier news, this has been a major summer of firsts for my son.
He:
Learned how to ride a bike with no training wheels
Lost his first tooth
Potty trained overnight (yes!) He simply decided one day he was ready. That’s how he does things.
Learned how to swim
Got his first pair of goggles
Jumped off diving board for first time
Got a new bed
Held a baby for the first time
Finished preschool
Some exciting, fun things during this crazy time in our lives.
Hope you all are staying safe and healthy.
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