About Me

I am 36 years old (37 now)(38 now)(49 now!), single, and want to become a mother. I had my ideal of marriage, house, baby, happiness. Well, life teaches you that nothing is certain and we all need to forge our own path. This is mine. UPDATE: and baby girl makes family :) And now baby boy makes bigger family!

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Baby Boy Birth Story

So it's been an interesting few weeks in our house. It's been a few years since I was on a newborn schedule and living in lack of sleep.  Trying to find time to type this when A) I am awake and can/want to focus B) child or children are sleeping....not easy to do.  The other thing that's hard to do is find time to eat. I normally like to eat lunch/dinner when things are calm, kid/s in bed. Well, now that there's two, it's not happening as often and I find myself at 9 pm thinking....did I even eat dinner?
On to the story....

BIRTH STORY
Let me back up a few weeks before baby boy was born.  Some major stuff.  Since I moved here and went back to my old company I learned that they were going through a global reorganization.  This one was a big one. I wasn't sure how it would affect us here in the U.S. and in my work group, but time would tell.  Well, 9 months pregnant and a few weeks until leave, my boss sits across from me and tells me my job is being eliminated. Ummmm, what?  Screeching tires, halt, did I hear correctly? Sure did. I wasn't prepared for it, that's for sure. I was just re-hired back in January, they paid to relocate me over here, I struggled for months to get settled, and now that I was getting there.....boom.  It took a bit to soak in, my "stability" gone, stress level gone up ten-fold.  Here I was about to give birth and that should be my primary focus, great time in everyone's life, etc. etc.....and wham. It was tough in our group because several others impacted as well.  Now, I do have possibility of staying w/ the company in a different role, but will see how that plays out. Should know more in next few weeks.  It just wasn't at all what I had envisioned going into maternity leave and having my baby boy.

With that as a backdrop, in terms of physical discomfort, the weekend before he was born I was just feeling "off". I didn't feel good at all, my energy level dropped, walking was pretty painful because he was still growing, my stomach was stretched and itchy, I wore a lot of dresses on the weekend because other clothes just were uncomfortable.  I had baby girl's babysitters watch her most of the weekend so I could just lie down on the couch. I was also having a lot of pains in the lower front of my stomach. I wasn't sure if they were brax.to.n hic.ks or real contractions, but they would come on and tighten my lower stomach/pelvic area, hang around for over 30 seconds sometimes, then go away. Sometimes once, sometimes several times in a row....no pattern. By Monday/Tuesday I decided to call the Dr. because I just didn't feel well. I told the nurse I was having the pains, my back was hurting, and I just felt 'different'. She told me I can come in to be checked, or wait longer at home and see. She was really nice and said that there is no magic answer as to when to come in or when baby will come. She said if I felt like I should go, then I should.  Well, I didn't go because I didn't feel like it was time and I had an appointment on Thursday w/ them anyway.
Well, Wednesday rolls around and think I worked from home, not sure, but by that night when I was lying on the sofa I was having more of the pains. They would come on, no pattern. But they were kinda strong. I still wasn't sure if they were real so I just tried to relax and rest. About midnight or so I decided to go lay in my bed and less than a few hours later I felt a familiar feeling--warm water. My water broke at home around 1:50am. I jumped out of bed so fast and because there was carpet I went into the bathroom and in the tub. I took off my clothes and sure enough more and more water was coming. It was tinged w/ some red, but otherwise clear.
It was on!
I wasn't sure who to call first because my one friend who was going to take me had been at my house earlier and she was actually sick. I think I tried her first anyway but she didn't answer the phone. I called my babysitter who lives a few houses down and simply said my water broke, time for the baby. She said she'd be right down.  I put a towel between my legs and started getting my bag together (of course I hadn't packed it yet). The pains I was feeling earlier? Yup, they were contractions because they started to come on in the same place and a bit harder--making me have to stop what I was doing and just breathe through. I wasn't worried the baby was coming any minute so I was just taking my time getting my things together. The babysitter and her daughter showed up and by now it was about 2:15am.  Because my one friend didn't answer the phone I had to figure how I was going to get to the hospital. I needed someone to stay w/ baby girl and someone to take me. So, I called my other babysitter who said she'd be over to take me.
For some reason after I was packed and before the second babysitter got here, I just felt like I wanted to go to the hospital and drive myself. Just like last time. I was ready so I just told the one that was here I was going. She tried to suggest I stay and was I sure....but I reasoned that once I got to the hospital, if it was anything like before I would be waiting for a long time before delivery anyway, so let me just go, get checked in, and see how it went. As soon as I had an update, I would call.
So I went.  Crazy I know, but that's just what I wanted to do.
On my way to the hospital my one friend who didn't answer earlier called to see what was going on and I told her my water broke, on the way to hospital. She had taken a ton of ny.qu.il and was barely with it so I told her to hang up, I'll talk to her later. She said once I got to hospital to call her.
I got to the hospital, parked, and then realized I needed to get up to the 6th floor labor and delivery--and it seemed like a long walk from parking garage to floor. I was still having pains and they were pretty strong. No regular pattern again, but still there. I had my dress on, towel between my legs, walking through the parking garage, dragging my rolling luggage behind me, and stopping every so often to breathe and fix the towel that just wouldn't stay put. I can only imagine what a sight I was.  There was a guy sitting on a bench I remember right by the entrance.....it was just he and I that were up and moving at that time. I kept hoping, please don't look my way.....and he didn't.
I finally made it up to the check in.
The woman started asking me to sign the digital signature pad and I thought I was already pre-registered. Contractions kept coming so I had to stop, wince, and breathe a few times while she went through her shpeil. Finally she said I could walk down the opposite side and go to labor and delivery. That hall seemed sooooo long.  I kept wondering where are the people w/wheelchairs in this place!!

They met me at the door and walked me to a room and asked me to put on a gown. I remember looking at the clock and it was 2:45am. Got there pretty fast. I had my phone next to me as I was lying on the gurney when nurse came in and started w/ all the questions. The most important one....when did I last eat?  Well, 9pm the evening before. Why most important? If they were going to do a c-section w/ anesthesia, they have to wait 8 hours before they can do it. 8 hours. 8 hours! As I was lying there the contractions were getting harder....and somewhat closer together. It was really painful. I had to completely stop talking, breathe, scrunch up my face (that made me feel better) and breathe it out.
They had to get ahold of my main Dr. because they wanted direction due to the blood thinner. Had not weaned off yet. I was also wondering if they would try and stop the contractions like last time for many hours (even though they didn't really stop) because of blood thinner as well. I kept asking questions to the nurse like a) could they give me something for the pain (no) and b) would my Dr. be doing the c-section (they never really answered that one) and c) when would there be the c-section. The longer I was lying on the gurney while they were figuring this out I was feeling harder pain and feeling quite sick.  No one was around and all of a sudden I felt like I was going to be sick. I yelled out, "Help me, Help me" but no one came. So, I sat up and threw up all over the floor. Then they came. I'm not sure if it was before or after I threw up that I decided to call my friend to see if she could come to the hospital. I wasn't sure exactly when the c-section would be but I knew I didn't want to be there by myself feeling that bad. I called my one friend and she decided she had too much medicine for it to be safe to come, so I called my babysitter w/ my daughter.  She said she'd get either the second babysitter to come and get babygirl or figure something out. (She ended up calling her sister to come and stay until second babysitter picked her up in the morning usual time). By this time it was around 4am.
I was still lying on the gurney feeling terrible and my babysitter showed up, thankfully. I told her I had been sick and after she came another wave of hot flash/nausea came.....this time at least she got the pink plastic bin. Sometime in here the anesthesiologist came in and asked several questions, the nurse told me they had gotten ahold of my Dr. and they said it was okay to proceed w/ c-section w/ a block (not an epidural) and thankfully I would be awake for it this time.  They decided it could safely be done at 5:30am and that's when they would "roll me back".  That meant that I would have to lie there in pain/contractions for another almost hour before I could go back. I asked a few times if they could do anything for pain.....I think the anesthesiologist was trying to placate me because he said well, if it got bad enough I should let nurses know and they would see what they could do. The nurses basically said I would just have hang in there and breathe through.
My babysitter was great. At first she was talking but whenever a contraction came I said I can't talk, she stopped talking, until it was over. Then she also tried to pat my arm, etc. and I said no touch, it made me feel worse. She listened to me and did whatever she could to support. She also got the camera out and took some amazing pictures throughout the whole birth experience. She just kept snapping and as I look back through, it was all captured.
Finally the nurse came in w/ the outfit for my babysitter and said we were ready to go. I was so thankful and I asked if I had to walk? They said no. They wheeled me down the hall into the surgery room. I was looking around while going down the hall and noticed a lot of very young Dr.'s. I asked the guy next to me if this was a teaching hospital and he said yes, it was.  It was very bright in the operating room, the table was set up, the baby bin set up to the side. They wheeled me right next to the operating table and on the count of three moved me over.  I did have to sit up on the new table because the anesthesiologist needed to put in the block. I was in a lot of pain by that point and was having sharp/hard contractions which made it difficult to do anything but breathe through them. They showed me how to hunch over and they said I'd feel some stinging. That part didn't hurt but when they put in the needle or whatever it was, that hurt. I said ouch and the guy moved it and I said ouch again. He thought it wasn't in right because I heard him say, "well, she said ouch". They said they got it and laid me down. It didn't take effect immediately because I was still having contractions--hurting bad. After a few more minutes I kept testing to see if I could move my legs/feet. Finally warmness sort of washed over my legs and I couldn't move them and the contractions stopped. Oh em gee was that some much needed relief.
They put the curtain up in front of me and people were all around.

Several people introduced themselves throughout.....there seemed to be a lot of people in there. I wasn't sure who the Dr. was though. There were two ladies prepping near my belly so I just assumed one of them was the Dr. (it was). Next thing I know I hear "Incision". In my mind I was thinking wait a minute, my babysitter wasn't there! But shortly after that she came in and sat next to my head...she had the trusty camera w/ her thankfully.  They were giving me something in my IV that made me a little dreamy, but not completely. Not sure if it was pain med or what, but it calmed me, but I could still focus somewhat. Next thing I remember saying is "Gotta love the smell of your own burning flesh". They were using that tool to stop bleeding, I think, but man it was awful. A few more minutes later they said I was going to feel a lot of pressure on my chest. I thought that was weird, but sure enough I thought my rib cage was going to explode. In my mind I seriously thought my ribs were going to break. There was such force on them (on the left side) but it was behind the curtain I couldn't see what was going on. I think I said I couldn't breathe, ouch, my chest hurts, something to that effect....later my babysitter said someone was nearly sitting/pushing down hard to help get the baby out.

He finally came out at 6:19am.

They took him over to baby bin. I could only hear them and he wasn't crying. I asked if he was ok and they said yes. I said I can't hear him crying. He's not crying.  The nurses were tending to him and said he was a 'relaxed fellow' or something of that sort. I never did hear him scream out, I don't think. My babysitter was right next to him after he was born watching over everything and she said he was just chill. Not what I expected but they said he was ok.  At this point I had a lot of medicine in me because it was somewhat hard to focus. I just stared up at the ceiling while they sewed up and finished w/ the baby. Soon they brought him over wrapped up tight and I got to nuzzle him and kiss his little head. I put my hand on his head and that moment was very tender. I asked my babysitter to stay w/ the baby while they took me back to my room. I don't remember much of being wheeled out and put back in a room, but shortly after I got to the room my babysitter came in and then they brought the baby to my room!  This was so different because last time baby went to N.I.CU. I got to hold him right after he was born. That was just so great...even though I was just out of surgery I was feeling good enough to hold him.
At some point we were transferred to the post partum room I was going to be in for the rest of my stay. The room was huge/private and baby stayed right with me almost the whole time.  It was very interesting because they want the moms to keep the babies w/ them. I kept asking about whether they would take him to the nursery and they said they don't really do that, that the babies typically stay w/ the mom. I just thought that was so odd because what if I was on major medicine and couldn't feed/lift the baby, etc.?  I questioned several nurses about it and they all said the same thing.  However, when night came around I asked them about keeping him so I could get some rest. The nurse said sure, they would keep for a few hours, but they actually kept him until the next morning. I was in quite a bit of pain and for some reason thought I should turn to my side.....bad idea right after surgery.
The day after he was born I wanted his sister to come and meet him. I missed my girl too! So, babysitter brought her the next day and I could hear her before she even got to my room..."Mommy! Mommy!" she was yelling outside the door. She came in the room and I can't remember if she went to the baby bin first or my bed first....but she peered through the side of his bed and said "baby!" and tried to reach in--thankfully she was too short.  She also jumped up on my bed and she settled in right next to me. Oh that was so sweet. I kissed her head and brushed back her curls. I really missed her.  Her new phrase is "hold you" meaning she wanted to hold the baby so babysitter brought over the baby to both of us on the bed. I have the sweetest picture where she cups his face, leans in to kiss him, and I am holding both of them. OH I love these kids.
She isn't used to mama being "down" i.e. just out of surgery.....so I wasn't prepared for the accidental head lean into the stomach, kicks when getting up on/off bed, elbows when trying to sit up/get down....oh boy. But, it really was so great to see how excited she was about the new baby. We had spent about the last month talking about mama having a baby, the baby was in mama's belly, etc.. so she seemed to just go w/it.
The rest of the stay was fine...I got some rest, a few more visitors, and lots of cuddle/snuggle time w/ baby boy. They also want you up and moving around soon so I got out of bed the next day, I think, and that day or the next took a shower--which just felt fantastic. The babysitter stayed over night at the hospital with me a few nights which was really helpful considering baby was in the room almost whole time. I ended up staying 3 full days and going home on the 4th.

Overall, since I didn't go in w/ any expectations, I think the experience was a positive one. I had thought all along he would come early and it's a good thing since he was 8 lbs when he was born! I have had no complications from the birth/surgery and things have transitioned pretty smoothly since coming home--now we've been home a few weeks. More to come on life with two.....but at least I captured his story now instead of waiting 2 years....sorry baby girl. It will come.

1 comment:

  1. Oh my gosh, I was laughing out loud at the part about you in the parking lot with the towel! Glad you had a good experience and things are going well.

    ReplyDelete